B.O.O.K.

Note: This is not mine, I merely found it to be hilarious.
http://jokelibrary.net/words/library.html
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Introducing the new Bio-Optic Organized Knowledge device, trade-named -- BOOK.

BOOK is a revolutionary breakthrough in technology: no wires, no electric circuits, no batteries, nothing to be connected or switched on. It's so easy to use, even a child can operate it.

Compact and portable, it can be used anywhere -- even sitting in an armchair by the fire -- yet it is powerful enough to hold as much information as a CD-ROM disc.

Here's how it works:

BOOK is constructed of sequentially numbered sheets of paper (recyclable), each capable of holding thousands of bits of information. The pages are locked together with a custom-fit device called a binder which keeps the sheets in their correct sequence.

Opaque Paper Technology (OPT) allows manufacturers to use both sides of the sheet, doubling the information density and cutting costs. Experts are divided on the prospects for further increases in information density; for now, BOOKS with more information simply use more pages. Each sheet is scanned optically, registering information directly into your brain. A flick of the finger takes you to the next sheet.

BOOK may be taken up at any time and used merely by opening it.

BOOK never crashes or requires rebooting, though, like other devices, it can become damaged if coffee is spilled on it and it becomes unusable if dropped too many times on a hard surface. The "browse" feature allows you to move instantly to any sheet, and move forward or backward as you wish. Many come with an "index" feature, which pin-points the exact location of any selected information for instant retrieval.

An optional "BOOKmark" accessory allows you to open BOOK to the exact place you left it in a previous session -- even if the BOOK has been closed. BOOKmarks fit universal design standards; thus, a single BOOKmark can be used in BOOKs by various manufacturers. Conversely, numerous BOOK markers can be used in a single BOOK if the user wants to store numerous views at once. The number is limited only by the number of pages in the BOOK. You can also make personal notes next to BOOK text entries with optional programming tools, Portable Erasable Nib Cryptic Intercommunication Language Styli (PENCILS).

Portable, durable, and affordable, BOOK is being hailed as a precursor of a new entertainment wave. BOOK's appeal seems so certain that thousands of content creators have committed to the platform and investors are reportedly flocking to invest. Look for a flood of new titles soon.

Paper dolls

My sister is doing an event on her blog!

If you like paper dolls, or drawing, or historical costumes, you will want to participate in this event. Even if you don't participate, at least take a look at her posts. I know for a fact that she has already created some paper dolls that are simply stunning.

This event begins September 1st, and you can find the button on my sidebar.

~Jane~

Emma

My favorite movie is the new BBC Emma. Ah, it's wonderful. Mr. Knightly is amazing, and Jonny Lee Miller is such a good actor. He's so subtle, but you can tell exactly what he is thinking. When I first heard he was playing the role, I wasn't sure about it, because he is a little too short. But he is so perfect. I can't imagine anyone being better as Mr. Knightly. : )

I also love it because Emma is one of my favorite of Jane Austen's novels. It has such mystery about it. I love that Emma is so flawed, the author didn't think anyone would like her, but she is still sympathetic. She really suffers from her mistakes and learns that she is not always right.

I need to read that book again.

I am going to have to write several poems for my creative writing class. I am not very good at poetry. When I write one, I'll post it on here and let you guys see if it's any good.

~Jane~

Morning people

So this morning I am sitting in the classroom for Intro to Literature, waiting for class to begin. It's about 9:15 and I just came from English 101. It's a pretty full room. The situation is a little awkward. Everyone is sitting in their place and there is no sound except for some fidgeting and the clickity-clack of tiny cell phone keys as everyone texts someone else. Who would you text at 9:15 in the the morning? I wonder. I try to think of someone I can text, but the only person I ever text is my brother, and he is not a morning person.

Suddenly the silence is broken by one brave soul.

"Is everyone tired, or what?" He asks. Several people nod.
"I mean, nobody's talking or anything. It's kind of freaking me out." Several people giggle.
He is obviously a morning person, I think to myself.

There is a sound at the door, and another student enters.
"Hey, how are you doing?" The morning person asks cheerfully.

"Oh, good. Thanks." The poor student replies, a little bewildered at being greeted with such enthusiasim. He takes his seat.

There is silence again. The morning person makes another effort.
"So where is everyone going to college? I mean after here, of course." Since he was not speaking to anyone specific, nobody answers him.
"No takers, really?" He says.

Someone else comes through the door.
"Hi! How are you?" The morning person says, as if they were old friends. Luckily for him, this student is another morning person. She sits on the opposite side of the room from him, but they chat back and forth about various things. The first morning person mentions Florida.

"I just got married in Florida!" The girl tells him. She describes the weather and says how lovely everything was. The shy girl next to her says something.

"Well congragulations!" The first girl says. I guess the shy girl just got married too. They start chatting about their weddings.

The morning person has started talking to someone else on his side of the room. Suddenly he calls across to the second morning person with a question.
"Hey, is our teacher married or not?"
She doesn't know. He starts talking to the room in general about how some teachers get mad if you call them the wrong thing. Someone tells him to look for a wedding ring on her finger.

The whole room seems a little more awake now. There are only two people still using their cell phones. The rest of us are watching the morning person with amusement as he greets everyone who comes through the door. A few students are chatting with each other.

When the teacher enters, he calls out, "Good morning, Miss H!"
It doesn't matter that she is actually a "Mrs.", Or that her name is hyphenated so technically it begins with a "Z", she smiles at his happy greeting. She is a morning person too.

I like morning people.

First day of school

Today was long. Let me start from the very beginning.

Well, last night I went shopping for some new notebooks and a new bag big enough to carry my school stuff, then I went over to my Grandma's house to sleep over. Her house is just a few minutes from the school, and I have an eight o'clock class on Tuesdays and Thursdays.

Last night I had a really bad dream about home invaders or something and it was scary. So that alone made me tired today because I couldn't have slept very well. A bad dream leaves smudges on your day.

I woke up at 5:30 this morning. I really didn't need that much time to get ready but I was nervous. So I had some breakfast, showered and got ready to go.

I was very early. I sat in the hall on one of those benches with a bunch of other people who were waiting for the same class. It was awkward, and most people texted or something. (I have noticed at school that whenever anyone sits down to wait, they immedietely pull out their phone and look at it intently. I also must confess something very silly. Usually when this happens I am the only person not texting, so I get out my phone anyway and just watch the time on it.)

So we had that class finally, (English 102) and it was good. I liked the teacher. Then I went to Intro to Literature, which was also good, but a little more scary. I think I'm really going to like it, I'm just anticipating a lot of homework.

After a lunch break I came back and there was no place to park. I had to parallel park in a tiny little space behind a truck. I did better than I expected. It only took me two tries.

Next was Creative Writing. This class was not what I expected. The teacher is very relaxed, and he gives easy grades, and there will be a lot of class discussions. He gave us guidelines for the type of pieces he wants us to turn in, but no restrictions, and we can kind of decide what we write and when we turn it in. He wants 8 poems and two short stories by the end of the semester. Or you can substitute some of the poems for more short stories. Or instead of a short story you can write a screenplay. Or you can just write 10 poems and no stories.
See what I mean? It's very flexible. I guess that's a good thing, but I like structured classes better. I like to know exactly what I'm expected to do, and when I'm supposed to do them by. And I really like having my work graded. This teacher is going to give you a good grade as long as you try hard.
I suppose I will get used to it, and I'll probably love it, but it's not what I thought it was going to be.

So, after all this, I had to wait and go to the orthodontist.

I am so tired.

But I'm glad school has started. : )

~Jane~